Wednesday, April 4

Religion reform #6

Praying pretty much sucks the fun out of most religious activity, like a portly and spoilt child sucks cream from a chocolate éclair. Instead of prayer, could we not substitute any one of the following?
  • T-ball
  • Competitive cooking/baking
  • Beat boxing/glossolalia
  • Slapping contest
  • Air guitar shred-off
Perhaps you can see a common theme. Modern religion being community-oriented seems to have forgotten, or perhaps has attempted to suppress, our natural inclination to compete; especially in ridiculous events suited largely for adolescent teens, attention whores, or carnies (or all three).

Perhaps we can add to this list:
  • Lipsynching
  • Karate
  • Building a mousetrap-powered vehicle
  • Disco dance marathon
  • Skip rope for heart
  • Rock, Paper, Scissors Presents: Best Two out of Three
  • Root beer chug
  • All American pie eat
  • Noogies
  • Archery
  • Friendly rough-housing, "clowning around", etc.
  • Dragonboat, Dragonball, Dragonski, what-have-you
  • Reading a book aloud, one chapter at a time
Anything, and I mean anything, has got to be better than repeating psalms. Am I right?

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