Water isn't great. I mean, it's everything not to like about liquid. When people tell me how awesome drinks like whiskey and Diet Pepsi are made, they usually start with water and add a fuck tonne of yummy ingredients to it.
It's not unreasonable therefore to assume then that water sucks. You don't see people taking Diet Pepsi and adding a shit load of ingredients to that do you? (I mean, maybe some assholes do but that's fucking heresy if you ask me.) Diet Pepsi is fine the way it is. But water? Water needs some serious work.
Humans are so desperate to turn water into something it's not. We purify it, desalinize it, add sugar, take out minerals and other minerals, add colour, add the fermented byproduct of various decaying grains and/or fruits/vegetables, we even add bubbles for fuck's sake.
The only thing it's good for is bathing and water slides. Pass me a scotch.
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