Words I hate

Given the resources and time I'm certain I could prove mathematically, that anyone who uses the term "fortnight" is a complete douchebag.

There are exceptions of course.  For example, those swiped from the fifteenth century by time pirates.  But even in this rare circumstance, I would hope these confused time-travelers would be briefed on the appropriate use of the "F" word in our time period, viz. never.  Ever.

Barring the time pirate scenario, only the most rigorous farmers of douche whip out this anachronism. I can't understand why anyone would. Frankly, there are only two reasons to use this outmoded and obsolete junk-word:

1. You want to be appear clever by showing you know what "fortnight" means.
2. You willfully want to confuse anyone who doesn't know what "fortnight" means.

No matter how you slice it, you're a douche.  Why do you need to measure things in two-week periods anyway?  On the 'Bullshit Measurement of Time' scale it's nestled between 'Olympiad' and megaannums. Unless you're editing Silas Marner, you don't need to use the word "fortnight."

Besides, if something is going to happen in two weeks just drop the subject.  It's too far away for me to care.