In this very special Religion Reform, we ask the Toucan tough questions about life.
Is the only constant in life the pursuit of pleasure?
Of course. If you're doing anything contrary to the goal of getting PAID, then you're doing something wrong, son.
Will meat-eaters get into heaven?
No, but neither do most people over the age of fourteen. It's actually pretty quiet up there.
What is the ultimate fate of the Universe?
Probably the same as the origin of the Universe: who gives a shit?
I love my husband, but only my boyfriend understands me. What should I do?
Play them both until you get found out.
Why do hot dogs come in packages of ten and the buns in packages of eight?
For that, my son, you will have to wait.
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