Cracking News: Every Egg McMuffin sandwich is made with a freshly cracked Canada Grade A Egg.Well, stop the presses.
I could have guessed that McDonald's had a sense of humility about the quality of their product -- it is fast food after all -- but do they think McFood is so shitty that they have to brag about using real eggs in their breakfast sandwiches? Talk about battered wife syndrome.
And call me naive, but I expected nothing less than "freshly cracked" eggs. Breakfast is already pretty moron-proof, even for a retard in a McDonald's visor. Sure, I know about those liquid eggs in a carton, but that stuff's barely suitable for undergrads and inmates. Should I really be surprised that McMuffins are made of, you know, actual eggs?
McDonald's confidence must be at an all time low that they are actually pitching this as "news." As if to say: this just in, not everything on our menu is engineered bio-waste. Also: recent studies show that that Filet-O-Fish is in fact, edible.
How are consumers supposed to react to this news? With surprise? With elation? With a heartfelt nod and a "good on you, McDo"? If they're anything like me, they reacted with a placid "no shit" followed by a deep sense of suspicion about everything else on the menu.
Shut up about your fucking eggs, you assholes.
Oh, and thanks for the free coffee!
